Holy Cow! Things are moving faster than I expected soon the drama will be over, the troop meeting is being cancelled and T and one of the Moms will be doing cookie business over by the playground. A different meeting will be taking place to resolve all the issues.
I'm both excited and nervous about this meeting. Excited because I want the drama to end and nervous because that stupid part of me is fearful that I have somehow screwed up. Mostly excited. I just hope it doesn't get too melodramatic - I just can't go on dealing with it.
I just want this crap to be over. Get on with troop business. I've got my hands full with cookies and trying to find a job. I hope to be over this congestion soon and be back to the gym next week.
My house has been a wreck lately - and I've been putting some time into putting it back in proper OCD order. It's slow because I've been thoroughly cleaning as I go de-cluttering everything. This weekend the Holiday Decorations are being put away! Once and for all - it's gotta go. I'm sick of looking at it all. We're almost done with cookies and in a few weeks the cookies will be gone too. I can reclaim my living room. Of course, this sudden need to clean and be crazy orderly with my house is a straight reaction to dealing with the drama. The chaos is driving me insane and I feel the need to surround myself with the comfort of order. Broken somehow, but oh well, I'm in the mood to indulge my brokenness so I feel better. Granted, I'm not letting it take over my life, so as long as it doesn't become all consuming, I'll willing to indulge myself because I am keeping it on this side of sane.
I'm hoping next week to get back to the gym. I'm unhappy with my workout schedule, so I think I'll be signing up for time to sit with B and figure out a new routine. I'm not sure I want to keep working out at the gym. I keep finding myself looking at at-home stuff. Or things I can use at the park. I can't tell if I'm just bored with the workout at the gym or what. we'll see what that consultation says. I think I'm going to see the new girl about this though. B is just too used to me. lol I'm not sure. Maybe I"ll see them both and do both who knows?
As anxious as I feel right now, I also feel hopeful. I can see things starting to come together in that vision I have for my life. I know I just have to keep doing what I'm doing and I'll get where I'm going. I'm feeling that drive to get it done. NOW