Whelp. I decided to wait until next week until after my appt with Dr. Denham. T offered me some paid work with him on the house up near Coconut Creek. Doing some drywall and painting. Woohoo!!
As it turns out, it was a GOOD thing I didn't start at Costa Monday. I went ahead and started Helen on the after-care at school and then picked up by South Dade park's transportation during the later dismissal of the older grades. Yah, that didn't work out so well. The school forgot to send her to bus area, and she never made it to her after school program. Yah, so I was unhappy about that. I ran over to the school. The staff member who was supposed to send her over forgot and she wasn't on the paperwork either. If she'd had the right paperwork - she would have been reminded that Helen wasn't in the extended after-care program. Now, hopefully, everyone is clear where they are supposed to be in the afternoon, this week seems to be the week to work out the kinks in the plan! I'm also all paid up for after care until the end of the month! Helen will be in "camp" during vacation week, provided they get enough kids to hold it. She can leave camp for her gig with the Homestead Police, and I think T is going to have to take her to that. Well at least she was there today! I was afraid they were going to send her to after-care instead of putting her on the bus to go to her after school program.
After my last post, I went to the gym. I've gone back to logging my food because of the weight gain and the fact I have the fit bit now. Tracking the outgoing calories does me no good if I'm not tracking the incoming ones too. LOL I've learned a few things from my fit bit. Yes, my original concern that I'm more active than the formulas say I am. Granted, these days, I'm constantly moving. Even when sitting still, I'm not really still. I fidget, wiggle a foot, some part of my body needs to be moving. I am still having good and bad nights. It is REALLY helpful to know how I'm sleeping. Yes, I am burning more per day than I originally thought but not nearly as much as I feared it would be. What is abundantly clear to me is that I cannot skate by not working out. It is having a negative emotional impact as well as not progressing my fitness goals. That 30 minute run on the elliptical was all I needed to clear my head and give me the attitude adjustment I really needed.
I have no Nutrisystem food and I'm struggling with that. However, I don't feel bad about the struggle. I need to work this out and get the hang of eating completely on my own without any packaged food. That is my goal - to eat healthy without having to eat packaged food. In fact, I've decided to switch to Ala carte and not do the full plan anymore. If I need a little kick start or some help because things are too crazy....I can just go buy a week's worth at Walmart or buy random items from Walmart. I don't feel like I need the packaged foods so badly. I CAN do this and I believe in myself. FINALLY! I really think I can do this. The struggles I have no are just me working out the kinks!
The workout gave me time to really think about the marital issues we've been having lately. At the end of the day, the root cause of our problems is the time. There's just not enough time in the day. I have to just let that go. Things are not going to be as good as they were before because we just don't have the time to invest in the things we were doing before. It's time to hang onto each other and just grind it out. We both have professional goals we want to reach - and to get there we have to sacrifice time and be on the look out for our moments! Cherish those moments instead of being resentful that there aren't more of them. Ok that's ME that needs to do that. I think some of it is also me having too much free time on my hands. Idle time has always been and always will be my worst enemy. I'm meant to be busy. Fact of the matter is, I'm happiest when I'm swamped!
Our plan to have the girls do new troop shirts worked out GREAT! The girls had a blast! Got to show off their creative side and they had fun coming up in with Camp Names. I was able to handle troop business with the Moms also. We're all in to make Easter Baskets for the homeless, not so clear about the delivery of said baskets but we're at least all in to make them! We set a date for the end of cookie season pool party and decided our dues. Up until now, we've not been collecting dues! That has to change and we handled that. Everyone is up to date on upcoming events and it went so smooth! So much easier without the disruptive influences. I have all the images ready for the iron-ons and all I have to do now is print and iron on! Woohoo! It really did feel like a new beginning! Now, I just need to come up with next week's activity. I'll check Pinterest for something fun.
Time to go do that and then get some crochet in!
Showing posts with label Daily Grind. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Daily Grind. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
February 3, 2015
The burden has been lifted and in a week, I have my Ortho appointment and I'll finally know if I'm medically cleared to go back to work or not. I have concerns that to get a decent job I won't get the kind of hours I want (early in the day) but worrying about it now won't do me any good now - in fact, it's going to make things worse for me.
I've been struggling the last few days eating on time. My sleep schedule is still off and that exacerbates my food issues which is further fed by the stress levels from this drama that I don't want to get into in such a public forum. I don't cope well with drama, and we'll leave it at that.
What else do I need to do to get myself on track again? Not much, let me tell ya.
I've been struggling the last few days eating on time. My sleep schedule is still off and that exacerbates my food issues which is further fed by the stress levels from this drama that I don't want to get into in such a public forum. I don't cope well with drama, and we'll leave it at that.
What else do I need to do to get myself on track again? Not much, let me tell ya.
Friday, January 30, 2015
January 30, 2015
Holy Cow! Things are moving faster than I expected soon the drama will be over, the troop meeting is being cancelled and T and one of the Moms will be doing cookie business over by the playground. A different meeting will be taking place to resolve all the issues.
I'm both excited and nervous about this meeting. Excited because I want the drama to end and nervous because that stupid part of me is fearful that I have somehow screwed up. Mostly excited. I just hope it doesn't get too melodramatic - I just can't go on dealing with it.
I just want this crap to be over. Get on with troop business. I've got my hands full with cookies and trying to find a job. I hope to be over this congestion soon and be back to the gym next week.
My house has been a wreck lately - and I've been putting some time into putting it back in proper OCD order. It's slow because I've been thoroughly cleaning as I go de-cluttering everything. This weekend the Holiday Decorations are being put away! Once and for all - it's gotta go. I'm sick of looking at it all. We're almost done with cookies and in a few weeks the cookies will be gone too. I can reclaim my living room. Of course, this sudden need to clean and be crazy orderly with my house is a straight reaction to dealing with the drama. The chaos is driving me insane and I feel the need to surround myself with the comfort of order. Broken somehow, but oh well, I'm in the mood to indulge my brokenness so I feel better. Granted, I'm not letting it take over my life, so as long as it doesn't become all consuming, I'll willing to indulge myself because I am keeping it on this side of sane.
I'm hoping next week to get back to the gym. I'm unhappy with my workout schedule, so I think I'll be signing up for time to sit with B and figure out a new routine. I'm not sure I want to keep working out at the gym. I keep finding myself looking at at-home stuff. Or things I can use at the park. I can't tell if I'm just bored with the workout at the gym or what. we'll see what that consultation says. I think I'm going to see the new girl about this though. B is just too used to me. lol I'm not sure. Maybe I"ll see them both and do both who knows?
As anxious as I feel right now, I also feel hopeful. I can see things starting to come together in that vision I have for my life. I know I just have to keep doing what I'm doing and I'll get where I'm going. I'm feeling that drive to get it done. NOW
I'm both excited and nervous about this meeting. Excited because I want the drama to end and nervous because that stupid part of me is fearful that I have somehow screwed up. Mostly excited. I just hope it doesn't get too melodramatic - I just can't go on dealing with it.
I just want this crap to be over. Get on with troop business. I've got my hands full with cookies and trying to find a job. I hope to be over this congestion soon and be back to the gym next week.
My house has been a wreck lately - and I've been putting some time into putting it back in proper OCD order. It's slow because I've been thoroughly cleaning as I go de-cluttering everything. This weekend the Holiday Decorations are being put away! Once and for all - it's gotta go. I'm sick of looking at it all. We're almost done with cookies and in a few weeks the cookies will be gone too. I can reclaim my living room. Of course, this sudden need to clean and be crazy orderly with my house is a straight reaction to dealing with the drama. The chaos is driving me insane and I feel the need to surround myself with the comfort of order. Broken somehow, but oh well, I'm in the mood to indulge my brokenness so I feel better. Granted, I'm not letting it take over my life, so as long as it doesn't become all consuming, I'll willing to indulge myself because I am keeping it on this side of sane.
I'm hoping next week to get back to the gym. I'm unhappy with my workout schedule, so I think I'll be signing up for time to sit with B and figure out a new routine. I'm not sure I want to keep working out at the gym. I keep finding myself looking at at-home stuff. Or things I can use at the park. I can't tell if I'm just bored with the workout at the gym or what. we'll see what that consultation says. I think I'm going to see the new girl about this though. B is just too used to me. lol I'm not sure. Maybe I"ll see them both and do both who knows?
As anxious as I feel right now, I also feel hopeful. I can see things starting to come together in that vision I have for my life. I know I just have to keep doing what I'm doing and I'll get where I'm going. I'm feeling that drive to get it done. NOW
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
January 13, 2015
Today is my Lucky Day! It's my father's birthday! Yay! I still have my Pops around to celebrate it!! I'm super lucky for that!! My father is a Cancer survivor so I'm extra grateful for that!!
Today is going to be a quick drive-by type post. I'm still stewing on my "Master Plan" but some things are starting to come together in my head.
Tonight I have a Girl Scout meeting and we're handing out cookies. The situation with my co-leader continues to worsen as any and all attempts to talk with her about the situation is met with silence. Someone from council will be meeting with me and my co-leader R and we're going to talk to her about the overall problem and what council intends to do about it and what resolution we're looking to get. Also we've decided what will happen if we don't get that resolution. We'll see what happens, I informed the missing co-leader that we were meeting at 4 and asked her to come - she was told that the meeting is NOT about attacking her. It's not, I'm over it and just want to get down to the business of scouting and freaking cookies!!
On that note, it's time to start loading cases of cookies in my car so I can make this meeting on time! Woohoo!! We're officially underway as of today!
Today is going to be a quick drive-by type post. I'm still stewing on my "Master Plan" but some things are starting to come together in my head.
Tonight I have a Girl Scout meeting and we're handing out cookies. The situation with my co-leader continues to worsen as any and all attempts to talk with her about the situation is met with silence. Someone from council will be meeting with me and my co-leader R and we're going to talk to her about the overall problem and what council intends to do about it and what resolution we're looking to get. Also we've decided what will happen if we don't get that resolution. We'll see what happens, I informed the missing co-leader that we were meeting at 4 and asked her to come - she was told that the meeting is NOT about attacking her. It's not, I'm over it and just want to get down to the business of scouting and freaking cookies!!
On that note, it's time to start loading cases of cookies in my car so I can make this meeting on time! Woohoo!! We're officially underway as of today!
Wednesday, January 7, 2015
January 7, 2015
I did my weigh in yesterday. The damage is only 6 lbs. I have to be honest and say my reaction to that was "That's it??" I said I wasn't going to worry about a gain and I was surprised to discover that I wasn't the least bit worried. I have, after all, lost 80 lbs so far. Seriously, what's six pounds compared to that? Not a heck of a lot - let me tell ya!! A few weeks and I'll be right back down to 180. One of the first times in my life, I truly have complete confidence that I can lose it. It's not an unrealistic expectation, I know exactly what I need to do. I planned to indulge and indulge I did and now it's back to daily life and back on the weight loss train.
I thought about not weighing in.
"Wait til next week," that lying little voice said.
"It's not Monday, it won't be a true weigh-in"
HA!! Yah right. It's a true weigh in. I logged it on the NS site so now it really counts. Even though I have all that stuff hidden..."Nutrisystem" knows. Something about logging it on NS' site makes it REAL for me. I'm admitting it here and coming clean and I'll be doing that in the Facebook group soon too! Shout it from the rooftops as much as I dare! Some part of me is also a little happy. I did something normal and mundane - I gained weight from eating too much of the wrong things. Not some weirdo, thyroid, under-eating with a screwed up metabolism thing - just plain old overeating bad stuff. For so long something has been wrong with me...now nothing is wrong with me. If I overeat or eat the wrong things, I gain weight just like every one else. I'm not special or different and it's the best feeling in the world.
I see a shift in the way I look at my weight now. When I started, it was about getting healthy. Getting all that metabolism and blood sugar stuff under control. Yah, now it's under control. I'm in no danger of going back to that with a slip up here and a slip up there. There's no health threats looming large over my head. Now my focus is being like everyone else. Watching what I eat because I SHOULD! Do what I'm supposed to do because I'm supposed to do it! Wanting to do it for no reason other than I'm supposed to. That's actually motivation enough now. When did I become that person who has willpower to do things like that?? Me? Wuuuut?!
It kind of smacks me between the eyes sometimes. I'm that person. I can say,
"No, thanks. I think I'm going to have [insert a healthy option here] instead."
I'm not just accepting that I can't have certain foods, I just don't want that stuff anymore. Sure I still like quick and easy - but my standard for what I'll eat quick and easy sure has changed. I'm all about the crock pot cooking now. Cooking up a bunch of healthy food and having it in the fridge to just heat up when I need a fast option. Making my own frozen meals!! I keep seeing those plastic tv trays with lids and thinking I should buy some and start making my own frozen meals. Canning my own foods also. I make a great chili. It's ridiculously a lot like NS' chili except spicier and has no carrot cubes hidden in it. How awesome would it be to open up a jar of my own home-made chili......made with veggies from my own garden.
Grandiose thoughts for sure. Well, grandiose in the way I'm thinking the thoughts - but they can become reality. It will just not happen overnight - but it's a way of doing things I can work towards. I can work out growing a veggie garden. I can save up my cash to get the supplies to do canning. I have some of what I need and the rest can be acquired. I'll have to set aside time on the weekends to do cooking and then my canning and freezing. I can see the path. In the meantime I can make use of my crock pot and fridge to have healthy meal options always available even if they are "leftovers". Because that's really what this is....grandiose leftovers. LOL
This year will be different and better than last year. I will be working, and hopefully full-time work. I have one more goal to add to my list and I'll end today's post with that goal.
Short Term Goal: Save up and purchase Rosetta Stone's Spanish program and learn Spanish!
Long Term Goal: Speak fluent Spanish! My hopefully-on-day-sister-in-law speaks Spanish and she's offered to help me be more fluent! If nothing else, learning the language will help us be closer! she's a sweet gal and I'd love to know her better! I will admit, it has it's professional uses - and will help me with getting work and advancing.
I thought about not weighing in.
"Wait til next week," that lying little voice said.
"It's not Monday, it won't be a true weigh-in"
HA!! Yah right. It's a true weigh in. I logged it on the NS site so now it really counts. Even though I have all that stuff hidden..."Nutrisystem" knows. Something about logging it on NS' site makes it REAL for me. I'm admitting it here and coming clean and I'll be doing that in the Facebook group soon too! Shout it from the rooftops as much as I dare! Some part of me is also a little happy. I did something normal and mundane - I gained weight from eating too much of the wrong things. Not some weirdo, thyroid, under-eating with a screwed up metabolism thing - just plain old overeating bad stuff. For so long something has been wrong with me...now nothing is wrong with me. If I overeat or eat the wrong things, I gain weight just like every one else. I'm not special or different and it's the best feeling in the world.
I see a shift in the way I look at my weight now. When I started, it was about getting healthy. Getting all that metabolism and blood sugar stuff under control. Yah, now it's under control. I'm in no danger of going back to that with a slip up here and a slip up there. There's no health threats looming large over my head. Now my focus is being like everyone else. Watching what I eat because I SHOULD! Do what I'm supposed to do because I'm supposed to do it! Wanting to do it for no reason other than I'm supposed to. That's actually motivation enough now. When did I become that person who has willpower to do things like that?? Me? Wuuuut?!
It kind of smacks me between the eyes sometimes. I'm that person. I can say,
"No, thanks. I think I'm going to have [insert a healthy option here] instead."
I'm not just accepting that I can't have certain foods, I just don't want that stuff anymore. Sure I still like quick and easy - but my standard for what I'll eat quick and easy sure has changed. I'm all about the crock pot cooking now. Cooking up a bunch of healthy food and having it in the fridge to just heat up when I need a fast option. Making my own frozen meals!! I keep seeing those plastic tv trays with lids and thinking I should buy some and start making my own frozen meals. Canning my own foods also. I make a great chili. It's ridiculously a lot like NS' chili except spicier and has no carrot cubes hidden in it. How awesome would it be to open up a jar of my own home-made chili......made with veggies from my own garden.
Grandiose thoughts for sure. Well, grandiose in the way I'm thinking the thoughts - but they can become reality. It will just not happen overnight - but it's a way of doing things I can work towards. I can work out growing a veggie garden. I can save up my cash to get the supplies to do canning. I have some of what I need and the rest can be acquired. I'll have to set aside time on the weekends to do cooking and then my canning and freezing. I can see the path. In the meantime I can make use of my crock pot and fridge to have healthy meal options always available even if they are "leftovers". Because that's really what this is....grandiose leftovers. LOL
This year will be different and better than last year. I will be working, and hopefully full-time work. I have one more goal to add to my list and I'll end today's post with that goal.
Short Term Goal: Save up and purchase Rosetta Stone's Spanish program and learn Spanish!
Long Term Goal: Speak fluent Spanish! My hopefully-on-day-sister-in-law speaks Spanish and she's offered to help me be more fluent! If nothing else, learning the language will help us be closer! she's a sweet gal and I'd love to know her better! I will admit, it has it's professional uses - and will help me with getting work and advancing.
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
January 6, 2015
It's official now, I gained 6 lbs! It felt like it was three times that, I swore I wouldn't be unhappy with the result and I'm genuinely relieved. I know darned good and well I had things like creme broulee and giant cheesecake slices every night and some nights I had it twice so the actual result is way lower than I expected it to be.
I've taken my thyroid meds and am now playing my daily waiting game. Enjoying a cup of coffee and getting my blog on. Trying to figure out what I want for breakfast! I definitely need to do a little grocery shopping today - just to pick up a few things I'm going to need like coffee creamer. LOL
Lots to do today! I have a Girl Scout meeting tonight and I need to stop by the ATM and get a balance on the account so I can start keeping some kind of accounting of our funds and what we're doing with them. I'll see if there is someone at the bank who can help me log onto the bank's online banking so I can keep the books. Poor Laura need to get that off her shoulders. Starting Saturday I need to also start keeping track of who has what cookies out and who has paid for what cookies. Weeeee!! Everyone else gets so stressed out by cookie season but I really am not. It could be that I am not intimidated by the mountain of details that comes with cookie season. We're gearing up for the booths at the grocery stores and a week from Friday we have a our first booth at Winn Dixie and that's going to be fun because Winn Dixie allows us to have a table at each entrance because it has two. One of the other stores has two entrances but they've declined to let us put a table at each one. The girls have been doing great with their sales so far and now their sales numbers will really shoot up! They'll get to see what a difference the two tables vs one table makes with booth sales. I've really been making the focus of this cookie sale to learn business skills. Safe online marketing, tracking sales, etc. I'm definitely one happy camper. This job really plays up to my skill set most of which have a limited range of applications.
I've just about got it together for the day, I've got my to-do list in hand and now it's time to go get it done!!
Life is a grindstone. Whether it grinds us down or polishes us up depends on us ~Thomas L. Holdcroft
I've taken my thyroid meds and am now playing my daily waiting game. Enjoying a cup of coffee and getting my blog on. Trying to figure out what I want for breakfast! I definitely need to do a little grocery shopping today - just to pick up a few things I'm going to need like coffee creamer. LOL
Lots to do today! I have a Girl Scout meeting tonight and I need to stop by the ATM and get a balance on the account so I can start keeping some kind of accounting of our funds and what we're doing with them. I'll see if there is someone at the bank who can help me log onto the bank's online banking so I can keep the books. Poor Laura need to get that off her shoulders. Starting Saturday I need to also start keeping track of who has what cookies out and who has paid for what cookies. Weeeee!! Everyone else gets so stressed out by cookie season but I really am not. It could be that I am not intimidated by the mountain of details that comes with cookie season. We're gearing up for the booths at the grocery stores and a week from Friday we have a our first booth at Winn Dixie and that's going to be fun because Winn Dixie allows us to have a table at each entrance because it has two. One of the other stores has two entrances but they've declined to let us put a table at each one. The girls have been doing great with their sales so far and now their sales numbers will really shoot up! They'll get to see what a difference the two tables vs one table makes with booth sales. I've really been making the focus of this cookie sale to learn business skills. Safe online marketing, tracking sales, etc. I'm definitely one happy camper. This job really plays up to my skill set most of which have a limited range of applications.
I've just about got it together for the day, I've got my to-do list in hand and now it's time to go get it done!!
Life is a grindstone. Whether it grinds us down or polishes us up depends on us ~Thomas L. Holdcroft